Creative Writing homework: A one-sided conversation

 

Thelma, you will never believe what I saw while I was driving back from Costco yesterday. Well, yes I did get some good bargains at Costco. That new Amy Tan book, a basketball goal you hook onto your bedroom door, and a package of toilet paper, 40 rolls. Yes, I know, but it was so cheap I just had to go ahead and get it. We’ll keep it in the attic until we need it.

 

 Anyway, Thelma, I was driving down on Holbrook Campground Road. What? No they weren’t having Camp Meeting. They do that in the dog days of summer. I don’t know how they stand it in those cinderblock houses without air conditioning but those who go wouldn’t miss it for anything. I think it is Lois Bennett’s ice cream they go for. That’s what her husband Wayne says anyway.

 

 But listen, Thelma to what I saw. Of course you were listening, but…Yes you always listen. You’re a very good listener.

 

 It was a sign! I know there are signs everywhere but this one was hand written with a telephone number under it. No, well I did see some yard sale signs. No, there weren’t any yard sales in the yards, just the signs that were left over from last weekend. Yes, we missed the yard sales. Yes, and the garage sales, too. I agree, we do need to get out there and see what they’re selling. Yes, those American Pickers find some great buys in places like Cumming, GA. I know and that girl on Good Morning America, what’s her name? The cute blonde one that sits next to George Stefenapolis. You know the one who jumps ship sometimes and does those contests on HGTV where two couples go to flea markets and buy trash and try to beat each other by turning it into treasure. What is her name? Anyway, she may show up right here in Cumming one day and buy the stuff that should be ours. Alright, next weekend. Sure, but you have got to go early. All the good stuff is gone by daylight. Well, no, I’ve never been to one that early but my mama used to and that is what she said.

 

 But about the sign. I just can’t figure out who’d need to make a sign like this. Nobody I know has…Well I’m about to tell you. It said Lost….  No not lost dog. No not cat. No, No. It said Lost Peacock!

 

 Now, Thelma, you know I wouldn’t lie to you. I don’t know, Thelma. How do you lose a Peacock?

 

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